Have you ever had the experience of being drawn into spending time with, or even having a full-on romantic or business partnership with a person you know is connected to you in some way beyond the tangible, physical connection you had established in this lifetime?

Usually, these relationships start with a bang. There’s an immediate sense of familiarity, kindredship, and excitement that comes with meeting and spending time with them.

Maybe it’s so magnetic that you spend WAY more time with them than you would normally spend with anyone in a row (three days instead of three hours?), or maybe you’re so drawn to them that you have sex with them without getting to even know them first.

Maybe you immediately start seeing with your mind’s eye the kinds of experiences and adventures you might have together, or the kinds of commitments you’ll take in the future. Maybe they suggest doing or being things with you you’ve been desiring for years and it taps into your deepest longing and moves you into tears of joy and relief.

Strong emotions come up to the surface, maybe even in an overwhelming way. Wounds come up to the surface to be healed, or just re-processed again. You are not sure where you start and they end. Something about you wants to melt into them and unite, blend completely. It’s so tempting.

Desires, projections, behavioral patterns, pleasing, wanting, separation anxiety, attachment to results, obsessive thoughts, a fuzziness when it comes to what you think, want, and feel can come up.

In the beginning, it feels so natural, effortlessly intimate, and familiar. You can easily believe it’s love. You can easily mistake it for love. You are so caught off guard, you actually have no idea how you feel but you feel obligated, connected, drawn, scared. You start noticing the red flags, but you want to believe it’s love. You want to “do the work”, you don’t want to run away from what feels hard. You don’t want to lose whatever this is.

I’ll stop with the descriptions now. It’s not love. It’s Karma, coming back to bite you in the ass. And if you’re not careful and you allow yourself to make decisions and take action from that place of emotional overwhelm, fear of loss, or trying to hold on, you will get burned. Again. Now, this isn’t meant to be some harsh or judgmental article about women who don’t learn their lesson and keep falling into the same karmic trap.

It’s not meant to make you feel yucky, or ashamed, broken, or small. So if you do feel any of those things- please stop immediately. Take a deep breath, put your hand on your heart space or womb space and feel your love, your divinity, your greatness, your sovereignty, your graceful beauty, the light you are within. The eternal part of yourself that isn’t bound by trauma, karma or anything other than love.

If that’s a bit of an overreach, then just take three breaths following your breath as it moves up the nostrils and into your lungs, belly, and back out, and let whatever you feel go through you without resistance and it will change into something else. Back to our topic - there is no one to blame for this pain. You’ve made agreements as a soul with others that you believed would advance your spiritual growth.

Some of them hurt.

Some of them are not relevant anymore.

You CAN break the cycle.

Remember, this pain and frustration are not who you truly are, it’s just your wounded parts taking the lead on your relationships (love or business). All you want is to be the one to take the lead instead, that’s all.

You CAN. I can show you how. I have ALL the compassion in the world for people who fall over and over again into Karmic relationships (you might know them as toxic relationships or trauma bonds or attachments), and hey I am definitely one of them! I’ve just gotten really good at identifying, learning what I have to learn, releasing it, and moving on. This is especially apparent in old souls, empaths and starseeds, but it can happen to any human being.

What to do Ella? I keep falling down the same damn rabbit hole with these karmic relationships.

Here are a few pointers, but please keep in mind, if you want to end karmic cycles of thousands of years, it will not happen in a day, or even a year. It will not happen because you read some book or visited a shaman once.

It’s a PROCESS - it’s your healing process, which will release you from the claws of patriarchy, energetic slavery and so many abundance, pleasure and creativity blocks which you were literally brainwashed into from infancy!

It takes work. But it is THE work, the most rewarding, heart wrenching, important and exciting work you can do in your life and one that I am dedicating my life to.

Pointers:

Learn to connect to your intuition more strongly. Most of the time, our intuition TELLS us all these things and shows us all the red flags, but the wounded parts and the soul parts that made the commitment and created the attachment in the past screws up with our truth of the present. Once you align with the truth of your intuition- you will win this fight with the old paradigm and create a new you.

Love yourself wherever you are. Self-love and compassion are at the root of my work with women because it is the baseline for everything we need to rise and ascend above our personalities and the lower wounded parts of ourselves. Know you are valuable no matter what. Do the work to love your body. Detach any connection made between your worth and the life circumstances you live in.

Improve your communication skills - this is key - for both the self-talk and the way you learn to express your needs, desires, and feelings in your relationships. This, in combination with self-love, will help you learn to establish, express, and hold healthy boundaries which you must have in order to magnetize true, fulfilling lasting love and relationship with money.

Work on your relationship to Money. Money holds so much of our pain, stuckness, trauma, and it shines so much light into generational trauma and the way we value ourselves. Fix your relationship to money and be well on your way to reconnect with your values and purpose in life.

Get to know the shadows, fears and wounds that surface up for you in intimate relationships. When you do this, they will no longer be managing the show. It takes time, but it’s so worth it.

Learn to differentiate between your inner masculine and feminine energies. Here you have the wounded masculine and feminine, which create and are drawn to karma bonds, but once you get to know them and heal them you can start knowing and using your higher feminine and masculine parts and create a sacred wedding of the two within you.

If you recently had heartbroken, experienced love bombing or abandonment (ghosting) or an overwhelm of unprocessed feelings in a karmic relationship, I hope this article helps you feel more belonging, less loneliness and gives you hope for a different future.

All my love,

Ella

P.S - If you are looking for a safe container where you can heal the pain that is causing you to be drawn to karma (trauma) bonds in love or money, perhaps Lady Bliss Money Love Mastermind is EXACTLY what you need. Read more and apply here to Lady Bliss Money Love Mastermind - A four-month limited space sisterhood into bliss which opens enrollment today- super exciting!

If you haven’t already, sign up for my healing vibes newsletter here or email team@ellamanor.com the word newsletter.

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Posts tagged with relationships

Breaking the Overwhelm = Growth Myth

Is it Love or is it Karma?